Dear Adele,
This week I’m a little sad cause my cat passed away.
Her name was Friend cause she was a friend to everyone.
She was really my boyfriend’s cat though. He was born in the
south so we called her Friend but pronounced with a southern accent. More like
Frand or Fran for short. Friend moved to
my house about two weeks ago when my boyfriend had to go back to the states for
an extended period of time.
Friend was like pure love bottled in a furry body. I have never
met an animal that could love so completely. When she sat on your heart and
purred that love just vibrated all the way through your soul. My boyfriend
thought many times to get her certified as a therapy cat – the kind you lend
out to people just for the amazing healing powers of their purr. She was our
healer kitty. A being who shone the light of the world through her. A scrap of
sunshine.
She started her life in a rough and tumble way. She was a
stray, a huntress, a wild kitty of the forest. Friend ran up to my boyfriend to
ask his help. She was defending her litter of kittens from a ferocious dog. All kittens were lost but one. He found that kitten a good home. Friend came home
to live with him and she adored him for his kindness. She was so thankful for the comfort of her new cared-for kitty life. That was more than 15 years ago.
In January Friend got sick. She slept the night under the
bed. As I lay above her I felt her complete gratitude to my boyfriend for the
life she had shared with him. All that she was, she was because of him, I felt
her kitty heart saying. She was at peace. Thanks to the wonders of modern
medicine Friend got better and we had another six lovely months of her love.
This last week she went to her litter box then started down
the hallway to come back to the bedroom but got too tired and just lay down and
didn’t get up again. I put out blankets and pillows and slept on the floor of
the hallway beside her with one hand under her head. In the morning the vet
confirmed that this was her time. We tried for a couple of days to see if she
would turn around but really those days served to turn us around away from
trying to fix her and towards embracing her journey. She had lived such a
beautiful life and she was telling us she was ready. We needed to be ready too.
When I patted her at the vet I imagined her spirit self as a
young huntress kitty, chasing grasshoppers in green fields and delighting in
the sounds of birds.
The night after she passed my boyfriend said he felt her
presence purring on his heart, just the way she had always done.
I recognize that it’s poignant to share Friend’s story with
you on this blog Adele, but I am sharing it, and with bravery, because I think
our goings out and our comings in can have much beauty to them. I think they
can be celebrated as much as grieved. I’m sad today for the change I face in my
life now but I am not sad for Friend. She was always a being of light and now
she is again in a different form.
Change is an ever-present part of being on this planet. We
in this arts community are all change-makers. We all believe, in our own way, in
making the world a better place through art and education. That bettering of
the world is a kind of change that we are good at. Crossing over may happen to
be a really great big change, but as change-makers its one that we are capable
of honouring and cherishing as much as any other change.
Adele, thank you for inviting us into your ongoing health-journey. I have so much gratitude for you and for the life-lessons I am
learning through loving you.
Hugs from Nicole
Friend (left) snoozing with brother kitty Remington (right)
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